Friday, February 8, 2013

Keep Going

Well, I did it! I signed up for another 5K. I will be doing the Color Me Rad on May 11th and I can't tell you how excited I am. :) Again, I will be walking it with a bunch of close friends, but it will be so much fun. Doing one race has got me into this weird kind of mood. I mean that I feel like I am progressing on being more confident in doing things that I think I can't. I can do them and I am trying to give myself more credit. So, I am continuing to move forward! I love it! I do have a little story to share that impressed me a bit. The end of January marked 11 years since I have been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. I can not believe it has been that long, as I feel like it was just yesterday that I was in Georgia. Anyway, I am currently taking and English class and we are writing a summary response paper. We had to read a few little short stories and pick one to use for our paper. We have to summarize the story in a paragraph and then respond to it in 2 paragraphs with a story, or develop an argument, or contemplate the theme, etc. Here is my paper: ***Ms. Dianne Kelly writes a personal story titled “I Ran Away Many Times” where she shares her feelings on her experience finding her own measure of peace. She had to go through some tough times while growing up, but came to realize that she had nothing left to lose but everything to gain. I can relate to this story because I had to find my own measure of peace after being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. Dianne explained that when she was a kid she would run away and sit in a tree for hours. She kept running away, and her parents never knew where she was. At fourteen, her parents signed custody of her over to the court, and she went to live in a farm house with other troubled teenagers. The rules were strict which made it hard to keep running away. As part of one of her punishments, she had to sit in a chair for sixteen hours a day for one week. This was her breaking point, and she realized that having nothing left to lose is the same as having everything to gain. She found a measure of peace at that moment. At some point in our lives, we all have to find some sort of peace with experiences going on around us. Eleven years ago, I was living across the country away from family members. One Saturday morning, I woke up and found myself not being able to move the right side of my body. I woke up my roommate and had her take me to the hospital as quick as she could. I thought I was having a stroke. Twelve hours, a CT scan, a MRI, and many blood tests later they let me go home. Monday I returned to the neurologist that saw me in the emergency room. That was the day that I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. At that moment I thought my life would be awful and completely different with this new illness. I thought I wouldn’t be able to walk or run, play my favorite sports, go hiking, and every other thing that required the full use of both legs and both arms. I couldn’t stop crying and felt completely alone. A few days later, my mom came to get me and my things to move me back home. During that week it took a lot of family support and prayers to help me through it. I had to find my measure of peace. After a few weeks, I realized I had two choices I could make. I could sit and be depressed with my illness or I could fight to strengthen myself to be normal again. I found my measure of peace when I decided to fight. Finding peace should be important in everyone’s lives. The author was able to turn her life and attitude around and I was able to relate to her story from my own experience. Finding peace in any difficult decision or experience can make life worth living.*** In class, we do what is called workshop. We get in group and read each other's stories and help that person correct errors or add any additional information needed. One guy read my first paragraph, looked at me with a puzzled look on his face and said, "Really!?" He stared at me for another second, a "Huh" came out of his mouth and he continued reading my paper. At the end, both guys reading my paper had nothing to say. It really does throw people back when they find out I have MS because I don't seem to fit the part. I wasn't quite sure what to think of his reaction and in fact I was kind of embarrassed. However, I guess this is good for me because 1. I feel like I am doing good (and my husband too) at taking care of myself or 2. God is kind and merciful and is keeping me healthy enough to feel like normal but still have challenges and 3. I am just lucky, I guess. Whatever the case may be I am okay with it because I found my measure of peace so long ago.