The Beginning

I was laying in bed last night, and the thought came to my mind to stop hiding that I have Multiple Sclerosis and share my feelings about it. There are so many people that know someone who has this chronic disease and ask me what I am doing, taking, and how I stay looking like I don't have anything wrong. And, it just so happens that someone is running for President right now who's wife has MS and the current first lady's father has MS. So I have been feeling connected to these people and everyone who seems to have the disease. So, I will be honest in my posts and share my thoughts on this disease that maybe I can help someone feel like they aren't alone. Maybe one day I will turn it into a book to give to my daughter so she knows about it and what I went through. So, here is the beginning of my MS story. January 2002, I was serving a mission for my church in Atlanta, Georgia. I had only been there for a month. It was an exhausting, heartbreaking, testimony building, strengthening, and delightful time of my life. It was the first time that I had lived outside of Utah and that far away from my family. I indeed was homesick and VERY tired. One morning I woke up to start my day. The usual scripture reading, showering, breakfast, etc. My companion wasn't feeling good for the past previous days. We decided to take her to the doctor for a sinus infection. As I can remember, I started feeling that my arm was asleep. I didn't quite understand as it was the weirdest sensation. I thought to myself that I must have a pinched nerve in my neck. From my journal entry that evening (Friday, January 25, 2002), "Today was a good day. Something weird is going on with my arm. It is all asleep. I can't really write with it....I'm kind of in a weird mood, so I'll write later. I'm going to bed. Sorry for the handwriting, I think I have a pinched nerve! Oh well, life goes on!" The next morning is when it all began. I woke up to start my usual routine, but I started with my shower. As I was cleaning and washing my hair, I realized that I could not feel the water going down the right side of my body. I panicked. I really did freek out. I got out of the shower and got out to get my companion. When she saw me and how freeked out I was, I remember seeing the look on her face. She too looked frightened and wasn't sure why my right side of my face was drooping. Here is my journal entry that I wrote on Friday, February 1, 2002.

And so, that was the beginning. It has been 10 years and 9 months since I have known that I have MS. There has been up's and down's, but I hope to share my story and maybe, just maybe, someone will feel like they aren't alone or that we can deal with this together. We all have our trials and things we have to face in this life, this just happens to be mine. I don't write this to get sympathy, as that is why I don't tell many people that I have MS. The common reaction is ***GASP*** "I'm sorry!". I hate that. It makes me feel smaller. But, I am now wanting to share and hope that we can all strengthen each other with all our different trials. Until next time.